god my neighbor just called me and she’s like… is this your chicken in our driveway… like who else has a chicken in this neighborhood yes it’s my chicken… so i get over there and kylo hen is chilling in their driveway eating some specs and stuff and there’s this actual crowd of people around her and i’m like… hi sorry mb let me get her… and oh my god… they’re like do you need us to call someone?? should we get help?? how should we do this?? do you need a net? like bitch it’s a chicken not a fucking komodo dragon. so i just… i was kind of joking around so i crouched down and patted my thighs and all the chickens are trained to come to me on sight because me = food… so i got down there and went “here girl!! come here!!” and the chicken comes running over and this group of actual adult ass individuals were staring at me like i was the fucking pied piper… and i didn’t know what to say…. so i just kind of walked back to my yard with the chicken following me and none of them moved or said a damn word and i think i literally just convinced them this chicken is trained like a dog…
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You're laughing. They've disrespected the pouch and you're laughing.
Random worldbuilding idea:
In a world with the classic Standard Fantasy Races, the concept of "mildly toxic just means spicy" is known to all of them, but what defines 'spicy' depends on what these specific people have the highest natural resistance to. Humans, who metabolise plant poisons remarkably well, naturally enjoy their chili, mint and other mildly irritating toxic plants in their food for spice. Dwarves have a whole gallery of various types of stones and minerals found underground, which are so precious to them that anyone finding a vein of a coveted crystal is set for life - the expression "as rich as a spice miner" is so common among dwarves that it's also spread to unrelated languages of people who live, or frequently trade or work with dwarves.
Elves, who are far too refined for such simple luxuries as toxic plants or rocks, prefer to spice their foods and wines with things that cause mild-but-harmless psychic damage. Elves from cultures that prefer spicier foods make fun of elves from milder cuisine cultures for not being able to handle spicy foods, while elves from mild cuisine cultures agree with non-elves that you can't even eat Spicy Elf Food without afterwards seeing demons for three weeks straight.
In contrast the orcs, who do not care for such fancily sophisticated luxuries as human plant spice or dwarvish rock spices, and are actually immune to elvish spices completely, prefer the simplicity of abrasive textures - common orcs add coarse sand into their foods, while warlords and orc rulers of high status might splurge in the luxury of having their dinners spiced with shards of glass.
Humans will sample the food of anyone but the orcs. Elves are actually surprised that humans also indulge in psychedelic mushrooms, and dwarves are amazed that humans can handle salt.
Expanding on this a little,
Goblins lower on the chain of command needing to scavenge for whatever food they could find, evolved to naturally like mild amounts of rot and mold. Goblins higher in the pecking order tend to flavor their food with poisonous and venoms produced by animals, they are particularly found of snake venom.
Gnomes eat all but the most poisonous mushrooms giving them an incomprehensible amount of variety in their meals.
Halflings/Hobbits: weed
I will not elaborate further
halflings, consuming a meal consisting entirely of various types of edibles: It's the butter that's the secret, can't overcook the butter or the merriment will fry right out of it. Our food is the tastiest of all culinary arts. Look at the human over there, this is surely the best meal she has ever had. She is so happy that she's weeping tears of joy!
human, stoned absolutely out of her fucking mind: Why do I have hands.
Love stories like this
Love seeing stuff like this cause we’ve always been here and we always will be.

















